Why I love having a daughter

Since I’ve done a ‘Why I love having sons’ post, it only makes sense to do one about having a daughter. One of the perks of having the best of both worlds.

I have always wanted a daughter.

We had two boys, and we decided that we were done with kids.

Although I always thought about having another baby, it wasn’t only because I wanted a daughter but I just missed having a little one to hold, and snuggle. I know missing the newborn stage isn’t the first thought that comes to mind, but I just wasn’t ready to say goodbye to it just yet.

We finally came to the decision to have another baby a few years later, and when I went for my first check-up at the doctor, I was told that we had a 85% chance of having another boy. The news rocked me a little bit. We knew this would be our last baby, and my last chance to have a daughter.

I made peace with the fact that there was a very high chance that I would always be a mama of boys, but deep down, I really hope that the statistic would be wrong.

This is the actual paper I have from my doctor with the gender reveal. As it was going to be last baby, I wanted to surprise the HB and the boys, and I baked cupcakes and would then put either blue or pink Smarties in the middle to reveal the colour. It was a bit of a fail as I didn’t wait for them to cool down enough, and all the colour melted off, leaving just a few pink stains on the outer layer of the candy. It was enough to show we were having a girl.

I cried. A lot. Really, I did. The overwhelming feeling wasn’t something I could easily shut off, but something was keeping me from completely trusting the answer.

The 85% was ringing in my head all the way until my next scan, and I made the doctor double check to make sure, so there were no surprises later on, and I really wanted to go out and buy pink things!

Our daughter is turning three in less than two months, and although she’s not a baby anymore, she’s still the ‘baby in our house’ and she sure likes to remind us about it.

It’s been an adjustment for me, although much easier now, having a daughter after having sons for the few years before her arrival. You can’t walk into her room without being overpowered by all the pink and purple, dolls everywhere and, of course, the unicorns.

I love it though, it lets me see our home from a different light. There are already talks about being a ballerina, which she really wants to be. Then there are days, she’s a pony and the most recent display is being a cat. She wants one too now, but it’s a no for us as neither HB and I are cat people.

Here are some of the reasons why I love having a daughter:

The clothing:

Have you walked through the girls clothing isle in the shops? Besides the obviously major selection of clothing, the clothes are just so adorable. I mean, there are so many garments, you don’t always know which you should take, and which you should leave.

The accessories:

Oh. Em. G! The accessories! The hair clips, the headband, hats, stocking, tutus, scarves. Have you seen how adorable some of them are?

The hairstyles:

Now that Kid3’s hair has reached a certain length, it’s fun to experiment with different hairstyles. And who cares if there are three ponytails? They look so darn cute. Now if only I can get her to wear the hair with a style for longer than an hour.

Independence:

In relation to my boys, Kid3 is independence-deluxe. She hardly wants help with anything, unless she’s past her patience levels and needs to throw her voice a little to be heard. She wants to dress herself and put her own shoes on, and carry her own things. Makes things a little easier.

Nappy changes:

While I did say changing nappies on boys was much easier than with a girl and that I’d choose that any day, I have to note that it was nice not being peed on each time I changed her nappy. It’s the small details to go on.

Potty training was easier:

You sit and there’s nothing more to it.

Tea parties:

We haven’t actually had a tea party, as she won’t drink tea but doesn’t a tea party without tea. I’m looking forward to later years where we can have coffee/tea dates and eat pastries and just talk. Movies have set a standard, you know.

Mama-daughter bond:

My bond with Kid3 is much different to the one I have with the boys. She’s the only one of the kids that has been home with me since birth, and I also breastfed her for almost a year, so it took her a very long to be comfortable with anyone else. Apart from all this, we had a bond she could never have with anyone else and I’m not-so-quietly happy about that.

Daddy-daughter bond:

There’s a special bond between a daughter and her daddy, and I can see it so clearly in our home. Don’t say it too loudly, but Kid3 has HB wrapped around her fingers a little more than the boys do.

Embrace femininity:

I won’t say I’ve always been very feminine, but since my daughter was born, I’ve been paying a little more attention to the attributes, and instilling femininity as a part of my life.

Becoming a role model:

This is the one that scares me a little. I get to be a role model and raise the next generation. Before I can be that, I need to make sure that my actions and words are set to the right examples, the correct lessons, explanations and behaviours. I can’t be someone she can look up to if I’m not living up to my own standards.

Know what she’ll go through:

Highschool. Boys. Mean girls. All waiting in line in the future. I’ll know what she’s going through because I gone through it, and it will be easier to guide her and help her with changes, people and situations. It might not always be an easy path (who am I kidding, it won’t be) but at least I’ll have a direction to move in.

I’m very much looking forward to seeing her grow, and eventually become a young lady. Until then, I’m embracing the tiny tutu-wearing ball of energy bouncing off the walls of our home.